I woke up today knowing that I would be rushing to get the kids off to school.
I had a funeral to attend.
Last Friday night Jon and I were coming home from "Thriller" in SLC. We went with Melinda and Spencer Lindahl, and Mandy. As we were driving back, we were held up in traffic. Little did we know that they were cleaning up the car that Lindsay was driving in.
Jon grew up with Lindsay's mom. I didn't know Lindsay personally, but I am sure I have met her at a party sometime. Lindsay was driving with her sister on the freeway that night and had a fatal accident. I don't want to repeat how it happened because I don't feel like I know the details enough to say.
What I do know is that I learned a lot from this young lady today.
In her short life of 16 years, she affected hundreds if not thousands of people. She always had a smile on her face. She played with the young children in the neighborhood even though she was older. She played music, and had a fun personality.
She helped everyone around her.
The church house was full of people to pay their respects to Lindsay. It was very emotional and hard to see the parents and the family closest to her speak of their love for her. Her two younger brothers spoke, as well as her older sister that was driving in the car with her, and her parents. I don't know how they did it. Her youngest brother cried the whole time and expressed how he would miss her. Everyone was in tears.
My heart goes out to them.
I kept picturing having to bury one of my children. It is something I think none of us fully understand unless we have to do it ourselves. I kept seeing flashes in my head of special moments in each of my children's lives. From the second a mother find out they are pregnant, something indescribable happens. For everyday after that, not a day goes by that you don't think, worry, pray and try to help them. It is a job that sometimes feels like it never ends, because it doesn't.
It is the most important job in the world. Mothers that care, make all of the difference.
It can be exhausting and sometimes feel like nobody appreciates you, but it is worth it. Everyone at the funeral could tell that Lindsay was raised by a family that loved her and taught her everything they could to prepare her for life, or death.
She had a strong testimony of the gospel as shown by her family today. They were mourning, but had a bright hope and knowledge that they would see her again. They shared part of her patriarical blessing that said she would affect many people around her for good.
I know that she has affected me forever. I came home with a renewed determination to do my best every day. To teach my kids what is most important, the plan of salvation. I want them to understand that we all mess up, but that we can keep improving and moving forward. More than anything I want them to know that I love them and that families are forever. Family is the most important thing on the earth. I am not perfect, I mess up like anyone else, but I will never give up.
Thank you Lindsay for your life and the difference you made in mine today.